Flights booked. Not long now, just three “wake ups” before I board and jet off to another continent, I’m so excited, I can barely sleep. The problem is, time has now take on a new pace, slowing down as if seconds tick past like minutes, the minutes like hours. I checked the time last night about 20 times in an hour, drifting off to sleep each time I checked, only to find virtually no time had passed, I gave up on sleeping after a while but that means more waking time to watch tick by. This is going to be a long, long, long few days. It’s like I am now running in hyper time and everyone else is in normal, unbearably slow time. Sitting here on the train watching everything in slow motion, people walking, working, eating as if in a surreal dream of slowness and I’m running on a different clock, checking the time and planning and double planning, working out what to pack, check the time, imagine the landing, meeting at the airport, check the time. You get the picture.

Putting a positive spin on it, it feels like a new super power. I’m typing like my fingers are on fire, filling my days with tasks and actually getting them done, merely a distraction you understand. I feel like I could snatch a bullet from it’s path as it glides slowly through the air in “normal time”. I promise not to try that for real, hopefully the metaphor stands though.

I’m going to see her, the center of my world (universe), my goddess, my love, my universal constant, the source of my super powers. After last time, I feel slightly (only slightly!) more confident that the world won’t implode when we touch but I do know for sure reality is going to change again, permanently, again. I keep running through the scenario of our meeting, there are a myriad of outcomes, some dreamy and romantic, others (many) positively R-rated, however, they all start with our eyes locking and me taking her into my arms, holding her tight, firm, safe in my grasp. Her face tilted upwards slightly, eyes telling a story, every story all at once. Communicating from afar has so many challenges and they will all pale into insignificance once we can look into each others eyes again, reading each others souls; reading our wants and needs as only we seem to be able to. While on other continents, we already have a sixth sense for each others moods and needs, I know when we are together they’ll be little need for verbal communication, we’ll just know everything. I won’t need to listen for her smile or hear the tiny sound she makes when she bites her bottom lip, I’ll be able to see it.

I am beside myself with a multitude of emotions, love, need, want, trepidation, fear, longing, love, the list is endless. Although there will be no need to talk, there are so many things I want to discuss, to listen to her tell me about, to hear her stories, opinions, moans (sorry). The small talk over a drink or dinner, chest time when we’ll discuss anything we fucking like because everything is fucking ok and nothing is off the fucking agenda. AFG, NFM. Pretty sure they’ll be lots of that too, I dream off that too, I have a few (many) plans.

For my love, my precious jewel, sparkling at me from across the void, you are literally the light of my world (universe). Don’t stop shining, I’m coming to you, for you. Please light the way.

Universe, seriously, sort the time thing out, you are killing me here. Oh, if you can fix these sniffles too, I’d really appreciate it!