I talk about my Angel, My Goddess often, well not so often here but elsewhere, all the time. I analyse my feelings for her often, time zones and distance will do that, not to mention lack of income. I’ve never felt the way I feel for her or the way she makes me feel and, I mean never, in all my (too many to mention) years. Sometimes I wrestle with the diversity of my feelings, from extreme to extreme, let me try to explain.

Love

I love her, truly, with all my heart. When I am apart from her, I ache. Sometimes, physical chest pains. I don’t know what to do with myself. I want nothing more than to lose myself in her beautiful eyes, hold her. Just hold her tight. Just hold her and feel her hold me back, we’ve done that a thousand times and I could do it forever. If I could, I would lay her down, naked, and kiss every inch of her face, her body, gently. Keeping my eyes on hers. Gently stroke her hair and run my fingertips across her everywhere, gentle, loving. Massage her for as long as she needs, no ulterior motive, just to make her comfortable, warm and relaxed. Take away any pain. Snuggle down with her, hold her while she lays on my chest. Hold her from behind as she sleeps, hold her face to face, while I nuzzle my face in her neck and she does the same to mine, so tight we feel safe, almost as one, nothing between us, Nothing.Fucking.Matters. I feel her pain as she feels mine, I am sad when she is sad and ecstatic when she is happy. I feel I can do anything when her hand is in my hand.

Physical

God I want her. Need her. She makes me feel masculine in a way I never believed; she turns me on more than I have ever experienced. I want her, All.The.Fucking.Time. I only have to picture her, and things start to swell. I want to take her, I want to make her come, I want to be inside her, everywhere, all at once. I can feel how she feels, I can feel how it feels to be inside her. I can picture her face while we are together and the pleasure it gives her. I can feel her buck against me, see her eyes tell me what she wants, I can hear her tell me (or at least hint) what she wants and what it’s doing. I can smell her skin, her hair, her, her. I can taste her. I want nothing more than to take her, put myself in her mouth, tell her to close it tight and push it in, just how she likes, eyes looking up at me and I can see what she wants. Come in her mouth, on her face, her boobs, her back, her ass. Inside her, everywhere. Push my tongue in her mouth and kiss her, taste myself, lick her ass, her sweet tight pussy, her clit, circle her beautiful boobs with my tongue and bite her nipples so it hurts just the way she likes it. I want to watch her come as many times as I can, it makes me hard to make her come, which works well for both of us. I want her so bad it hurts, sometimes throbbing-ly so. Anything.Fucking.Goes

These describe the extremes but it’s also everything in between, her intellect, how we understand each other, finish each other’s sentences and share our insights into each other’s experiences, “Yeah, you are so right” is something I love to hear and we both say it to each other often.

God, you seem to bring us together when we need each other, so many major life events we’ve shared passion, love, business, surgery, sickness, firing, bereavement. What is your plan? I implore you for guidance. Take care of her.

Universe, where have you been? So much of this you appeared to steer and now left us apart, what are you up to?